Charles (Chuck) Kensinger

We made it

May 28, 2026

Fifty years ago, Cindy and I promised each other we would be husband and wife for the rest of our lives. That’s what I mean. The hardest part wasn’t staying married. It was keeping each other alive. No, we haven’t fought life-threatening illnesses, except those that many of you have.

We’ve had surgeries, and Cindy survived COVID-19. I had a cold that year. We never had a time when it seemed like either of us would not survive. My parents and grandparents did not celebrate their fiftieth anniversary because they were not able to live that long.

Years ago, I watched an interview with a man on his one hundredth birthday. He was asked what he attributed his longevity to, and he responded, “I didn’t die.” That in itself is an accomplishment. Let’s chalk that one up to Cindy and I.

Another accomplishment is that we still love each other. Some marriages end prematurely because they stop trying to be in love. That is a misnomer, because all my faithful readers know, “Love is a verb.” I do not remember the first time I said that to her, but it was in the form of “I love you.”

We have often attempted to say this to each other over these fifty-plus years. Our first Christmas together was when Cindy turned sixteen. She was beautiful, and I wanted her to be mine. I may have tried to sing the song to her. If I did, she must have forgiven me for that. She knows I can’t carry a tune in a bucket.

We spent our first summer apart. I was in Pennsylvania, and she was chasing some guy that she and Debbie, her bridesmaid, thought looked like me, down Kearney Street. It wasn’t me, or I would not be writing this. No, I do not think she would have killed me, but she saw me get on the bus, and if I had not told her I was coming home, she probably would have ended the engagement.

We spent the next summer as husband and wife. That’s an interesting story that I’ve shared before. You can read that in “Doulos.” On our first anniversary, we lived in Joplin, in our third home together, and owned a dog. No, we did not get a dog to see if we wanted children. We got one because we wanted one. The same with the three kids. We had them because we wanted them, and discontinued birth control to make them possible.

We only have three because she started the pills again as soon as she could after each pregnancy. She may tell me I am wrong on the third. I can’t remember that far back. I mention this because this is another reason some do not stay together. They can’t agree whether they will have children or how many.

More than half of our grandchildren are over sixteen. None is married yet. We have no great-grands either. In this day, I must include that, or you may wonder. Life continues for all of us. We have been blessed to not have experienced any of those losses, either.

I do not mean that we have made it to perfection. We made it to our fiftieth anniversary date. Hopefully, we have a long way to go. We have three generations in our family. We are still a family. I believe that we are mostly functional. Pray that we are the people God wants us to be.

Grief is a tricky thing

May 26, 2026

I’ve been to many funerals over the years, and not even one has been for anyone who was not considered a good person. I am not sure that all “good people” qualify as born-again believers, but there is one question after a funeral that is universal.

“Would they have been touched by the heartfelt words that were shared?” Recently, I was at a service for a long-time friend who had been suffering from Alzheimer’s for years. Early on, he had asked our former pastor to officiate for him. This minister passed away last year.

I was pleasantly surprised to see a young pastor listed on the program in his place. The best part was that this preacher is the husband of one of the granddaughters. As a grandson-in-law, he has access to the library of sermons his ancestor used for these occasions. One was selected that I recognized from previous events.

One of my favorite parts in the Bible was used from John 14, where Jesus tells us that He is preparing a place for all his children. I have requested one of my former pastors to use this scripture at my service. He’s young enough, and I hope he will still be around when I die at 120.

It is said that nothing is certain except death and taxes. Another certainty is that when most of us go home, someone will grieve. I have some encouragement for you who are undergoing this process: if they were born-again believers, they are with our Lord and Savior.

Many verses in scripture assure us of this fact. I could write an entire series of columns on those verses, but I have done that before and will again when I am told to. My task today is to share what I know about this thing we call grief.

Grief is a tricky thing. Everyone goes through it, and while we can identify stages of dealing with grief, it is difficult to know what others are going through, even if you have lost someone. When my oldest brother died of a heart attack, his sons asked me if he was in Heaven.

Like many of us, he had accepted Christ at an early age, and his actions during his life were not what most church people would take as proof of this salvation. In my own case, I am sure some would deny that I made it either. These are people who think Christians must be perfect to see God when they die.

I shared with them that Kenny had made two professions of faith. One, before I was old enough to remember, and the second when we were teenagers. I saw him pray the sinner’s prayer and be baptized. The gospels say this is the one thing Jesus tells us we must do: admit our sin and ask for forgiveness.

Another problem with grief is that if we have made mistakes with friends and family and never gotten over all the problems, we may feel guilty. Remember to take it one step at a time. Grief’s a tricky thing.

One talent man

May 25, 2026

This is an idea I received from a preacher I heard recently. His sermon was on the parable that Jesus told of a ruler giving money to each of three servants before he left on a trip. This is written in Matthew 25:14-30. Read the story if you are not familiar with it.

Nathan, the speaker, talked about the reward the first two received for doubling the investment given to them. For those of you who are not familiar with the monetary value of talent, it is approximately one year’s wages. I have heard the analogy of this coin being about our spiritual gifts and abilities.

The man who received a single year’s salary was afraid of this ruler and did not wish to take a chance on failing. We were urged to not compare what God gives us with what others receive. Using what you have access to in the best way is what we should strive for.

The results of not investing the sum given to him caused dire results for the third fellow. I would like to take this story and alter the circumstances and the ultimate lesson. As a child, I recognized early on that I had few positive attributes. I was good at school subjects, and my favorite subject was English.

When the minister spoke of how many talents some are gifted with, it made me realize that I cannot sing or dance, and have no abilities for sports. Going into high school, I thought the only thing I was adept at was writing, so I chose a career in journalism.

In the 1970s, reporting changed from print to an emphasis on broadcast media. Watching Walter Cronkite and others on television made me realize that my shyness and fear of speaking in front of others needed to be overcome. My plan was to begin journalism in my junior year, and I started three years of speech and debate the year before.

My sophomore year in college, I was asked to preach at my church on youth Sunday. My single talent had multiplied into two when Christ called me into ministry later that spring. Returning to the parable, what would have changed if the one-talent man had an increase on the deposit made with him? He would have been rewarded as the other two were. Remember that they were given additional responsibilities.

I told Nathan, after church, that I was the One-Talent Man he had spoken of, except that when I was called to account for my gift, I had doubled it. Since finishing college, those abilities have continued to multiply exponentially.

My business and ministry experience has given me opportunities to learn leadership, counseling, and crisis negotiating skills, as well as given me a life of service to others, and has added to my knowledge, which has made my writing more prolific and enjoyable. Thank God, if you are a one-talent man.

We don’t want it

May 21, 2026

I just heard another commercial that bothers me. Have you heard about the companies that don’t want your money for what they are selling for a certain period? Most of these offers are for delayed interest payments.

Cindy and I enjoy these offers of no interest payments until a future date. What you may not know is that many of these contracts state that the interest is only waived if you pay off the debt before the specified date. We use this to our advantage.

We accept the free interest period and divide out the total cost of our purchase, so it is paid off before interest is accrued. This is an easy way to establish credit when you have had problems or are new to being a responsible adult.

Sometimes these offers include a credit card that you can continue to use. Do not fall victim to this trap. The issue with credit cards is that they do not expire like individual loans. After the limited date offer expires, you may only have 30 days to clear your account to prevent being charged interest.

This is the concept of getting you to take out a charge card at stores. Our first Discover card was issued to us when we made a purchase at the Battlefield Mall Sears store. Recently, we were given a Home Depot card on a similar type of deal.

We had a plan to clear up this cost within the allotted months. No, it and the Lowe’s card are in the lock box and kept until this type of offer comes again for another purchase. Stop and think for just a minute before you pay cash that is in savings when this type of offer is available.

If something happens and you need to use those savings for purchases that do not have this kind of deal, they will still be available. Being an adult is great, isn’t it. The commercials I was talking about at the beginning of this column are from vendors that act like they are benevolent.

Everyone must earn a living, whether you sell products or services or produce advertising like commercials. We do have a capitalistic economy, and buying and selling things is a legitimate way of making a living.

They are just good at marketing, but not as good as those companies that tell you openly that you will pay more if you do not pay it off entirely by the end of the offer. This is simply their tactic of choice. Honesty is the best policy. I’ve lived my life by this motto, and I still endorse it.

Why the Sabbath?

May 19, 2026

Christians and Jews celebrate a Sabbath or a day of rest because God made it one of His commandments. Around Springfield, MO, there used to be a “Blue Law” that prohibited certain types of stores from being open on Sundays and products such as alcoholic beverages from being sold. Those laws have been removed from the books for many years.

Why would God tell us to take one day off every seven? According to Exodus and Leviticus, it is to be Holy or separate, and by Jewish law, no work was to be done. The Talmud (Jewish holy law) even specifies the number of steps a Jew could take before it became work and violated the Sabbath. Is there a reason for this?

Today, doctors tell us that we must get the proper amount of rest. They focus mostly on the number of hours of sleep each night. There has been research into the effects of not taking at least one day off each week. Some companies have found that a four-day work week works for them.

Paid time off or vacation time is often a benefit that your employer provides. Most of us work forty hours per week, and that should give us two or more days of downtime that we can use each week. If you do not use this time to rest, then your health may suffer.

There seems to be a trend among younger workers to spend more than forty hours a week on their occupation. I remember being on a salary and believing that I should work as much extra as was needed without additional compensation. I thought this would be appreciated by my bosses. This did not work out.

Because of that, I advise you not to put your life on hold for something that you might receive. I’ve had employers make promises that I had to fight for, or that never appeared. Let’s face it, the wealthy sometimes get that way by cheating and lying. I did not mention President Trump so that he has no recourse against me if some know he fits this description.

I worked my way up to five weeks’ vacation at one position before leaving them for a different job. I went to work there because I wanted to stay with a company that has room for growth. I stayed with them until they convinced me that they did not agree with me that I could continue to progress.

I’m not saying that money should be your focus in employment choices. Work-life balance is important, and the old saying is true: “All work and no play makes Chuck a dull boy.” Put your name in for mine on this quotation.

Modern research tells us that this balance, proper sleep and nutrition, as well as getting away from stress, is the reason not to work seven days a week. Even the Beatles knew that Eight Days a Week was not enough for the best things in life. It should not surprise us that Jehovah reminds us to give Him one day.

I hope that none of my posts are ever listed in the trending bar on any social media pages. I dislike the term trendy or in. The problem I have with this is that shortly after you are in, you are out. I have built my life on just being me, not in, nor out, just strong and steady and the same today and tomorrow.

I learned at an early age that those who were popular in school soon were not popular with those who were ignored by whatever group they were in. That went from church to elementary school all the way through college. I have taken classes since I retired, and continue to see every generation doing this.

I am proud to announce that it is no worse than when I began first grade in the fall of 1960. It has not gotten any better, either. Fortunately, individuals often do not follow the groups and include outsiders in their circle of friends. I have many of these circles.

I used to have those that I worked with, and I changed that to those with whom I once shared office or plant facilities. I have always had friends, family, church families, and ever-popular brothers from other mothers. You know them, I hope. The guys or ladies you have collected over the years that you have known since…

You can fill in the dots. It may be any grade or period. Gary is what I call a hand-me-down friend. He started school with my oldest brother, Kenny, then Bud and I inherited him when the oldest graduated from high school and joined the Navy. Gary joined the Guard and went for his basic training, and then, he and I were at college together.

His nephew Michael was born on my sixteenth birthday, and when he turned sixteen, his family joined our church. On our birthday, we were having a youth fellowship, and when he came into the building, I greeted him with “Happy Sixteenth Birthday, Michael.”

He looked at me and did not even know anything about me except that his parents knew me. “How did you know it was my birthday? Oh, you saw my mom bring in the cake.” I replied, “No, this is my birthday, also, and I am thirty-two today. You were born on my sixteenth birthday.”

I am creating a new circle and not one of influence. It is a circle of readers, and I share with you, and you can return the favor through the comments. We will continue to think about how we treat others and how we want them to act towards us, despite what is trending.

Look at those who are in your groups and discuss whether you agree that we all need to be kinder and pay attention to those who are having problems, and continue to find ways to encourage our friends, no matter where we know and meet them. This is a year-round activity we can all enjoy.

Management

May 15, 2026

Some are leaders, and others are followers. We have heard this all our lives. If it is true. Which are you? That should depend on the situation you are in. At times, even the best leader should step back and allow others to take the reins.

Managers are leaders. The best allows others to lead when they show talents and abilities. I have often trained employees who eventually became department supervisors or managers. My management experience began with my first job while still in high school.

Does that seem unusual to you? I’ve gotten to know many leads, supervisors, and managers over the years who have started in the ranks and worked their way up in companies. You know that old saying, “The cream always rises to the top.”

The most important upper managers that you know of have most likely started at lower levels. What is the President of the United States? He is the chief executive. That means he is the top manager. He has lower management that works for him. Each Cabinet member also manages their staff as well.

Think about the people that you have voted for during the last few decades. Most of the candidates were governors, senators, and congressmen who began at lower levels of state government or even as assistants to others who worked in these offices.

The problems any business has can also crop up in government. Managers who try to bully their way through, around, or over employees seem to exist everywhere. I’ve noticed commercials on local TV for an attorney who is asking women to call her if their bosses are acting inappropriately

These are the worst cases of bad management, but there are a lot of poor managers out there in the business world. I would rather take some time to tell you what I learned from some of my best managers. Mr. Costello owned Dog N Suds on North Glenstone in the 1970s, and he taught me to treat everyone the way I wanted to be treated. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

Tom hired me as a salesman and promoted me to a store manager in three months. He then recommended me to be the assistant livestock manager at the wholesale company owned by the man who owned the pet stores. He and the livestock manager, John, then recommended me for my first purchasing position.

Gary hired me as a buyer and made me his purchasing supervisor with the intention of my taking his position when he moved from purchasing to another spot in the company. I learned from some of the best, and I have trained some of the best. Accept help and pass it on.

Reality programs

May 12, 2026

I have a problem with so-called reality shows. Can there be a survivor when no one dies? Everyone on the show is a survivor. The title should be Survivors. Big Brother just shows a group of people whose every move is recorded. And they know it. Keep in mind that a reality TV show may not have a script, even though each participant has an agenda.

They write their own scripts. I create dialogue as every writer does. Often it is done in our heads. Sometimes we write it down. Other times, we save it until we can use it at the appropriate time. I have certain lines I like to use. If you say, “That drives me crazy,” I reply, “That’s not a drive it’s a short putt.”

Saying that there is no written script for these shows does not make them reality. If you want reality, put together a program made of 100% security videos where all or most of those on camera do not realize they are being recorded. The problem with this is that it would be eavesdropping and therefore illegal.

If you want true drama, comedy, and spontaneity you should watch game shows. Especially the daytime ones where there are few questions that could be studied ahead of time. Jeopardy and the other knowledge related shows can be rehearsed with many different types of questions.

I think shows like that require the contestants to try out and prove that they will not stand there with a dumb look on their faces. Shows such as “Let’s Make a Deal” or “The Price is Right” allow people to act however they want and they encourage weird and unusual behavior.

The question I have about these folks is that they always look at the audience to receive help. Especially on Drew Carey’s program it appears to me that they select contestants that cannot or will not make their own decisions. When Wayne Bradey asks his players about their jobs, very few are managers that are required to know how to make split second decisions.

Even the women who look like they know the prices of groceries seem to know little about cars, vacations, or electronics. The men that shop for these products seem not to buy their own groceries, snacks or drinks, that’s why they are always looking at wives or girlfriends in the audience.

I’ve noticed some actual reality on these games. Some use their minds to weigh the odds and not take chances that are almost always easy to predict as losers. That brings me to another long-time contest called “Wheel of Fortune.” This is supposed to be like the brain busters with a gambling twist.

When someone risks their turn and what money they already have for the chance at a ten-thousand-dollar wedge which they never get to claim I cringe. LMAD also thrives on those who are into taking chances. I don’t understand risking a twenty-five-thousand-dollar car for a one out of three chance of gaining a prize that is not that expensive. I guess not everyone in LA drives.

And then there was one

May 10, 2026

No, I did not misquote the name of a famous Agatha Christy novel and movie. She is the last of the Clemens clan, belonging to James and Gertrude from Webster County, Missouri. She is my aunt. She has twelve siblings who made it to adulthood. Currently, we call her Aunt Amanda. I will save her the embarrassment of telling you what her parents and siblings used to call her.

As the years progress and we lose first one and then another of the cousins and someday the last of the Clemens sisters, I want to take this Mother’s Day to honor my Mom, Mary. We are cheered by the memories and encouraged that even more are in store for our children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.

I could tell you about my mother’s sisters and brothers, and I have in my book “Doulos.” You can read it as a paid subscriber to my premium materials. Whom I want to write about today is my mother.

Her name is Mary Francis Clemens Kensinger, which I know makes us sound like we are not true Americans. We are, and she began her life with the first three on this list. When she and Evan Kensinger were married, she, like 99% of her generation, took his last name. When you read that I have an Uncle Sam and say his pen name is Mark Twain, it is because she is a Clemens.

Our daughters and the other grandchildren called her Granny. When I was a kid, she talked about Irene Ryan, who played Daisy Moses on “The Beverly Hillbillies,” and when our oldest was born, she said she would be Granny. I completely understood why.

Mom was one of the reasons I know how to be a good parent and spouse. I received my share of spankings and other discipline types over the years, but I noticed that my sister and I were not given corporal punishment as often as our older brothers. We tried to follow that example with our girls. We spanked from time to time when we thought it was required.

Mom and Dad demonstrated what it meant to love with the Agape’ love of Jehovah as Paul describes. They were patient, kind, and faithful to each other. Mom demonstrated that to me often, no more so than when she described a conversation with one of Dad’s doctors.

Dad was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was in high school, and Mom would take him to the hospital whenever his medication needed to be changed. This was a constant with that disease. Once she told me that she told the doctor that she was done. He asked her if she meant she wanted a divorce. Her response was, “Of course not.”

She said that what she meant was that she was done with dealing with the return of the symptoms and had delayed bringing him back as long as she felt was best. I never knew about this, and it was one of many things she confessed to me after he had passed away.

Thank you, Mom, for all you gave Cindy and I. Our marriage has been blessed by your example, and I work every day to love Cindy and our daughters the way you loved Dad and us kids. Thank you for the book title, also.

Seasoned Educator

May 9, 2026

That’s what Mrs. Jackson was when she was my teacher in the first and second grades. I’m not sure how much seasoning she had, but she looked older than my Mom and Dad. They were in their thirties, and I thought she must be somewhere between them and my grandparents.

My third-grade teacher was about my parents’ age. Most of my teachers through grade school and junior high were in that range between my parents and their folks, at least until 7th-grade gym. That was the coach’s first year out of college. After the first quarter, he and my Dad had a conversation.

He gave me the first “D” I ever received on a grade card. It was the only grade below a “B” that I saw on any report. When my father saw it, he asked me a lot of questions. Was I always in class and dressed out? Did I follow instructions, and did I try my best?

I told him that my grade was low because I could not do as many sit-ups, pull-ups, push-ups, or run as fast as my classmates. The next morning, when he dropped me off at school, he parked and went inside to talk to the coach. Next quarter, my grade was a “B” for both quarters.

In high school, I continued to have seasoned teachers, and in my freshman year, I thought that our Spanish teacher had a little too much seasoning for my classmate Vern and I. We were in the Spanish III class as freshmen. Our class was the first to have had Spanish since fifth grade.

The administration said that we had the equivalent of the first two high school classes. She disagreed and told us that if we did not pass the first test, she would make us take the first class even if we had to wait until the following year. The scores on our first test were tied with two seniors. We all had 98%.

After that, we had no more trouble with our instructor. Another first-time teacher came along in my sophomore year. She taught my favorite subject, chemistry, and she was a hot, newly graduated blond female. Not at all seasoned in the least. She was an enjoyable, fresh face for this teenage boy. I found out that you can be seasoned at some things without being very old. One of my classmates asked if we had to heat glass tubing before we bent it. I thought that was a dumb question because of my experience.

Experience is the best teacher is a saying I’ve heard forever. My business experience proved to me that my education was a very useful thing. When I began to work in an office, I did not rely on secretaries to type purchase orders or sales documents for me; I could do that myself.

In college, my typing and shorthand from high school enabled me to take notes fast and type them as well. I still have those notes in my files for reference in my writing when I need them.

When I had the opportunity to become a sales service specialist, it was necessary to use algebraic equations to determine drive speeds, ratios, belt and chain lengths, as well as numerous other things like torque and horsepower required for machinery. When someone says they never use those skills, they probably haven’t thought about all the ways mathematics, reading, and writing have to be used in our technological world.

Walk With a Servant