Family – Charles (Chuck) Kensinger

It’s just business

July 23, 2026

I hate that saying. I hear it in movies and TV shows but have never heard it in real life. This phrase is usually proceeded by “It isn’t personal.” But it is personal in business, if you want your commercial relationships to succeed. When your business isn’t personal it will most likely fail.

Relationships must be personal or else they will not work. The opposite of personal is impersonal like immoral is not moral. Let me tell you about the similarities and contrasts in my life for the last seventy years. I should probably say sixty-five because I don’t remember much before 1960.

My parents made raising my brothers and sister and I a job that they participated in. We rarely had a babysitter. My oldest brother could watch us by the time I was eight or nine and our parents allowed that from time to time. This was usually at home, but he also took my other brother and I to the park, school, and the movies.

He and the rest of my family were there for us. They did it because they cared about us and not because someone paid them to do it. I remember going to my uncle Dean’s home for a family event after we had an accident in our car. He saw the damage and proceeded to do what he could to repair it quickly. I thought of that day when we were at his funeral.

My first boss, when I turned sixteen, demonstrated that you can operate a business providing teenagers with work experience and a paycheck while encouraging them to work hard. Our daughters were fortunate enough to have a similar experience in their early years. It was personal and not just business.

I’ve spent over fifty years in ministry and after a few years I determined my ministry was in the workplace. I was to serve the people I encountered in business and just in life for Jesus. I have been a friend, a listening ear, a confidant, and even a pastor to many even though I have never pastored a church.

I have performed weddings, funerals, and answered questions about anything they would ask. I have answered the tough questions. I think the hardest was, “If God created everything, who created God?” The answer, “He has always existed. That is what makes Him God.” His name is “I am that I am.” I knew this question was coming and did not know the answer until it was asked. In that moment, I just answered what came to my mind through Holy Spirit.

If you think the decisions that you make in your business life are not personal, let me ask you to put yourself in place of the one that is affected. If you were laid off, had your pay frozen, or refused a promotion, would you accept this as just being business? Decisions should affect everyone in the company, not just certain people or departments.

I hope that none of my posts are ever listed in the trending bar on any social media pages. I dislike the term trendy or in. The problem I have with this is that shortly after you are in, you are out. I have built my life on just being me, not in, nor out, just strong and steady and the same today and tomorrow.

I learned at an early age that those who were popular in school soon were not popular with those who were ignored by whatever group they were in. That went from church to elementary school all the way through college. I have taken classes since I retired, and continue to see every generation doing this.

I am proud to announce that it is no worse than when I began first grade in the fall of 1960. It has not gotten any better, either. Fortunately, individuals often do not follow the groups and include outsiders in their circle of friends. I have many of these circles.

I used to have those that I worked with, and I changed that to those with whom I once shared office or plant facilities. I have always had friends, family, church families, and ever-popular brothers from other mothers. You know them, I hope. The guys or ladies you have collected over the years that you have known since…

You can fill in the dots. It may be any grade or period. Gary is what I call a hand-me-down friend. He started school with my oldest brother, Kenny, then Bud and I inherited him when the oldest graduated from high school and joined the Navy. Gary joined the Guard and went for his basic training, and then, he and I were at college together.

His nephew Michael was born on my sixteenth birthday, and when he turned sixteen, his family joined our church. On our birthday, we were having a youth fellowship, and when he came into the building, I greeted him with “Happy Sixteenth Birthday, Michael.”

He looked at me and did not even know anything about me except that his parents knew me. “How did you know it was my birthday? Oh, you saw my mom bring in the cake.” I replied, “No, this is my birthday, also, and I am thirty-two today. You were born on my sixteenth birthday.”

I am creating a new circle and not one of influence. It is a circle of readers, and I share with you, and you can return the favor through the comments. We will continue to think about how we treat others and how we want them to act towards us, despite what is trending.

Look at those who are in your groups and discuss whether you agree that we all need to be kinder and pay attention to those who are having problems, and continue to find ways to encourage our friends, no matter where we know and meet them. This is a year-round activity we can all enjoy.

WEDDINGS

April 23, 2026

Do you like weddings? I do. That is why I have married several different women. No, it isn’t what you think. Cindy is my first and only wife, but I have officiated at many wedding ceremonies for friends and, in some cases, people I did not know until I was asked to celebrate their marriage with them.

The first was Eldon, who was the store manager at the Wendy’s restaurant in Joplin, MO. Cindy and I moved there two weeks after our wedding. I worked at that restaurant from May of that year until September, when I left the Wendy’s of Southwest Missouri family.

Eldon and one of our employees had decided to get married. They were going to have the wedding at her church, but for some reason, her pastor was unable to officiate at the ceremony. Eldon asked if I was legal to perform weddings. At that time, Missouri laws were much stricter about who could officiate a wedding. I checked and found that you did not have to be ordained but only licensed to the ministry, which I was.

That was my first. I have done weddings for my brother Sam and his wife, my sister-in-law Sharon, my cousin Troy and his wife Coleen. I was even able to help another friend I worked with one Valentine’s Day. She had told me that they wanted to get married and had even gotten the marriage license.

On Valentine’s Day, she told me they were going to get married that day. Larry, her fiancé, was at the courthouse trying to find a judge to officiate at the ceremony. I told her to let me know if that did not work out. Later that day, she came back to my office and asked if I could help. We had the wedding that afternoon, and every year on Valentine’s Day, I wish them a happy anniversary.

Not every marriage that I have helped to begin has lasted this long. One may not have made it as long as celebrity weddings. The day after the ceremony, the bride called and asked if I could tear up the marriage license. The copy I left with had already been mailed to the county recorder. I always drop them in a mailbox when I go home after the wedding. I can be fined if it isn’t postmarked within a certain period. She asked what she could do, and I told her she would need to call a lawyer if they could not work it out.

I had only been able to have one counseling session with them because of the time crunch they were in. After that, I was skeptical about officiating at weddings for people I do not know. Since my second daughter was married and I performed their ceremony, I have not done a wedding. Their oldest daughter turns nineteen this year.

Marriage is not what it once was. Today, in Missouri, a twenty-one-year-old and a seventeen-year-old cannot be married even with parental consent. That apparently isn’t important to anyone but me. Cindy was seventeen, and I was the dirty old man of twenty-one when we were married in Springfield, MO, and her mother signed our marriage license.

This is the reason that my state representative will not have my vote this year. He voted for that bill. You may ask why I am so adamant about this. Laws were already in place that prevented parents from filing statutory rape charges for a child who was seventeen and had sex with someone of majority age. Now, the parents of this same person do not have the right to authorize a wedding. To me, that is sanctioning promiscuity.

My boys and girls

March 26, 2026

I have often written about my eighteen years of teaching youth at Hamlin Church. Before that, I taught fifth and sixth-grade boys there, as well. I have been a children’s church director on two different occasions while at Hamlin. It has been my church home for over forty years.

My reason for this column is to thank all the men and women that I have had the pleasure of serving over the past fifty or more years as a leader in churches. I spent one summer in Pennsylvania and eighteen months in Joplin, MO, and the balance of this time here in Springfield, MO.

I can cite the names of some of the hundreds of kids and young people that I worked with as a leader, teacher, and minister. You are all my kids. I see some of you frequently, and some I have not visited in person for over fifty years. I’ll tell you about the recent ones.

There was Jason, Ryan, Mendy, Jody, Matt, Michael, Kara, Herschell, Kevin, Brandon, Gina, Cara, Stephanie, and others. I am so proud of all these individuals, as well as the ones that I have not seen for too many years. Some of them are doctors, nurses, teachers, ministers, businessmen and women, and in practically every profession you can imagine.

I cannot count the number of men and women that I have had the privilege of serving. I’ve been a teacher, friend, mentor, and supporter as they learned and grew. I’ve worked with their parents, grandparents, and families to encourage them to become the wonderful parents and grandparents they are today.

To say that I am proud of them is an understatement. My part was very minimal in their lives. They were under my tutelage for only a couple of years, but I have followed them as they have grown, been educated, married, and had children. Some are better known to me than others. All of them have made me proud to know them.

We have three daughters, three sons-in-law, and twelve grandchildren that I am also extremely proud of. My love for them is unbounded. My ministry is not over, and it will continue until my health restricts me or Jesus calls me home.

Spencers, Waltons, and Hamners

March 20, 2026

The only name you may recognize in this list is the Waltons. Earl Hamner, Jr. created this TV series that first aired in 1972. I graduated from high school in May of that year. The first episode of the Waltons aired on CBS television on September fourteenth of that year. You can say that my adult life began with this creation of Mr. Hamner.

This was not the first incarnation of this story by the author. “Spencer’s Mountain” was first published in 1961. He had begun his writing career as a script writer. His first short play that was produced was “The Hound of Heaven” that aired January 15, 1953, on The Kate Smith Show.

Spencer’s Mountain became a movie in 1963 starring Henry Fonda and Maureen O’Hara. The plots are similar. The characters are familiar from the Waltons series. This book was the story that John Boy wrote about his family. As writers, we are told to write what we know.

The character John Boy in the original book and movie was named Clay Boy after his father Clay Spenser, Sr. This makes me wonder if Earl Hamner, Jr., was called Earl Boy when he was growing up. He was the first one in a large family to go to college and become a writer.

Most of The Walton episodes were not written by Hamner. He was the Executive Producer and had final say on the scripts. While every story was not his he did make sure they were true to his concept of who his family was. As always, literary licenses were issued as needed.

Many of Hamner’s personal beliefs appear in these episodes. He was constantly exposing problems to those who were trying to take advantage of others. The Ballwin sisters, who were bootleggers, even though they did not know it, were not viewed as criminals. Blacks and orphans were seen as being oppressed.

Walton’s view of World War II was very much the way my mother remembered things as she was growing up at that time. Walton’s was a favorite of hers. She shared with me that many of the news reports of things that were occurring in Europe were viewed with doubt by her family as well.

Many of the story lines resonated with me. John Jr. wanted to be a writer and went to college to study. He was always writing a story or book. The season he purchased an old press and published his own newspaper was especially interesting to me.

The idea of living with grandparents was not that familiar and I was used to having two brothers and a sister at home. I sympathized with the Walton children when they wished they were only children. The different interests and occupations the family chose were as varied as my own. The main variation was that no one in my family became a musician or nurse.

My columns do follow a similar tack that John Boy followed by writing about the family and those things that happened to them. If you are like me and wish that the producers would come up with more family programming like this, at least with our current technology, we can watch these older shows on our streaming services. Happy watching, and I’ll share others that I have watched when they were new.

“Chuck”

March 2, 2026

https://www.youtube.com/embed/TFdjgZOQrIM

Have you ever seen this TV series from 2007 to 2012? I am going to tell you something that has never been published anywhere before now. This story is about me. It has been altered greatly from my true original story. I did not go to Stanford University or work as a computer nerd.

I do not know Chris Fedak or Josh Schwartz who are the creators of this show. How they were able to link this fictional tale to my name is beyond me. I do not want any royalties or profit from their scripts. Titles cannot be copy written and I have no claim against anyone for infringing upon my privacy.

Why do I say this series was based on my life? First it is my name. Then there is the beautiful woman that I am married to. The character of Sarah Walker and Cindy do not have the same hair color. Cindy has never worked for the CIA and the way we met was completely different from what the series shows.

My best friend at the time ended up being my best man at our wedding and surprisingly, they got the part correct that we worked together. They also got it right that I have a sister. They did leave out my two brothers. Neither of my parents were spies and they were at our wedding as well.

They also got it correct that I did not finish at the university where I started my degree program. However, I was not expelled, I transferred and did receive my diploma from another college. I also never let my girlfriend drive my company car, so she never wrecked it. I played video games but not much after Cindy and I began dating. As I recall, neither did Chuck after he met Sarah.

That is another way that the writers hit my story head on. I know that if they tried to stay closer to my real life it would have been boring. I am just glad that they did not make it a situation comedy. The dramedy genre was a much more flattering format.

I can just see if they had titled it everybody loves Chuck or according to Chuck. All the crazy stuff my brothers and sister and I did would not have been half as interesting as the scripts for those two shows. I do wish that one of the characters in M.A.S.H., the Waltons, or Dr. Quinn Medicine woman had been Chuck or Cindy. In that case the show I claimed as ours would have lasted a lot longer.

Is there a show that you wish you could claim was about your life? Comment below and tell me the similarities and the differences in yours. If no one comments I will know that I am still a unique individual. Happy watching.

Last Call for Football

February 8, 2026

Thank God. I get tired of the fall, Christmas, and New Year’s onslaught of NFL and college games. I do not like sports of any kind. I know most of you do not understand that. I do not get why some of you would rather watch TV or movies and never read a book. To me, that is crazy.

I am also tired of Christmas movies at this time of year. If I wanted to see a Christmas rom-com, I have a streaming service and can watch it there. I subscribe to the company I am with to receive specific types of programming. No news, no sports, and many channels that do not offer the latest movies and TV.

We like reruns. We also like new movies and programming from certain channels that are more Christian oriented that the typical providers. We like Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman, and The Waltons, and we want family shows of that type.

Another one that we enjoy is Seventh Heaven. Hallmark, MeTV, Cozy, and Great American Family, where is it? Is it too expensive to purchase? I get that. I see it available for purchase on Amazon. It just isn’t one of the freebies, and we are frugal.

So, at this moment, it is Sunday afternoon, February 8, 2026, and the TV is not on. Later, when the Olympics or the Stupid Bowl is on, we will watch something else. We also have a library of Blu-ray and DVD discs to choose from. We might just watch Fraggle Rock. We have the entire Jim Henson series.

The commercial that has the line “Last call for football” is another type of ad I would like to see removed from my channels. Sports gambling is now legal in Missouri. I am sick of Kevin Hart. One syndicate uses him, and the scripts they give him make him look like an insensitive idiot. I know that is one type of character that he portrays.

I hope they paid him enough money for that so that he never needs to work again, because it will be a long time before I will pay to see him in anything. I think these spots are hurting his career, not helping it.

But what do I know? I took a job because I thought God wanted me to, and I ended up unemployed for three years because they lied about me to other companies. How do I know that? In every position I was considered for until I dropped them from my resume, I did not receive an offer. As soon as I left them off the list and made it look like I was working through a temp agency at that time, I got the next job.

Not everything you do is good for you. You can still learn something from everything you do. Maybe even watching football or Christmas movies in February. Whatever floats your boat. Just don’t invite me to your party. I will politely decline.

If I knew Grandchildren

December 31, 2025

would be this much fun, I would have had them first

By Charles Kensinger

Introduction

This is a phrase that my mother, Mary, used to say. Cindy and I were fortunate to give her and my dad their first grandchildren. This was not true of Cindy’s mother. Two of her older siblings already had children when Heather, our oldest, was born.

I realize that you know a Heather. Chances are you know dozens, hundreds, or possibly more. I can talk about my children and grands without most of you having any idea who they are. The only way you will recognize them in this book is if they tell you this is who they are.

That is the point. I wrote “Doulos” over a decade ago. If you’re a paid subscriber, you can search for the categories and find it. There are a few chapters that are available to all readers of Douloigroup.org. my web site. This book is another memoir. We now have twelve grandchildren.

They need to know their stories, as seen through our eyes. If you like this idea and would like to do the same for your family, look for, “Your Story, Your Way.” That is also available as I work on it.

I know some of you who have written books think my method is strange. Yes, it is and that is why I want everyone who is interested to see how to go from introduction to final chapter. It is nerve racking and time consuming. Follow along as I write this new story.

Happy Birthday, Cindy

December 25, 2025

I was thinking about my first Christmas when Cindy and I were dating. She was fifteen, and I was twenty when we started dating. I do not remember what I gave her for her birthday. I do remember picking her up that morning and bringing her to our home.

She had been there several times before. Mom and Dad had no problem with this girlfriend coming for Christmas dinner. Cindy did not know that there was another celebration scheduled for that afternoon. When we were eating dessert, there was a birthday cake.

Mom, Mary, made the statement that Christmas was over. It was now Cindy’s birthday. If she were alive, that birthday would have been remembered after we had Christmas dinner. This has been the tradition with our girls and the entire family almost every year since then. First, it’s Christmas, and then it is over, and the birthday begins.

After her sixteenth birthday that year, she earned her driver’s license. When she completed her sophomore year in high school, we were engaged. After she turned seventeen, we were married, and that first December after we moved to Joplin, she turned eighteen and brought my lunch to me at the convenience store where I was the assistant manager.

We now spend her birthdays at home with our grandchildren when they can all make it. The problem is that as she has celebrated her day of birth, it has been overshadowed by the so-called birth of the man named Jesus. Someone thousands of years ago determined to change a pagan festival to Christmas.

Happy Birthday, Jesus is a great song to sing today, but we will sing Happy Birthday, dear Cindy. She is a few years past her twentieth, and our time together has been spent remembering the actual day of her birth, not some holiday concocted by the manufacturers and retailers to guilt us into buying stuff they could never sell without advertising.

This year, our family will remember Christmas in a few days, and tomorrow, all I must do is celebrate Cindy’s birthday with a quiet meal. This is my way of wishing Cindy a happy birthday and telling her that I love her as much or more than I did when we honored her at her sixteenth birthday party the first Christmas we spent together. 1-4-3, baby.

Good Times

December 24, 2025

I spend a lot of my columns remembering the good times of my life. This time, I would like to speak to my younger readers. If you are sixteen to twenty-four years old, these should be some great times for you. It is Christmas on top of that. Let’s talk about what is going on right now for you.

You probably still live at home with mom and dad if you are fortunate, as I was. Even if you only live with one parent or some other responsible adult, I hope you are having a great time. You have friends and family around. Enjoy them by going to school or church functions.

Don’t skip the family or work parties. I had a great time with the guys and gals I worked with in high school and college. We had a good time. No one got drunk, or high, or shot, or arrested. That is what I hope for you.

Don’t worry about the bad stuff in the news. Most of us are blessed enough to go through life without being directly involved in situations that make it to the local news. I know you do not think your parents and other adults treat you the way they should. That’s life, get used to it.

Enjoy the parades, concerts, parties, and just driving around looking at the decorations and lights. You are young. Someday, you will be old like me, and you want to have those memories. What memories? Read my other columns, and you will learn of my recollections.

If you are in a choir, band, orchestra, or clubs, go to the parties. Stay away from the drugs and drinking and the “friends” that ask you to do things you don’t want to. There are times that you don’t have anything to do so grab a couple of friends and do what you want to do, as long it is legal, mostly.

I lived in a small city where it was safe to walk or drive around town and enjoy the sights, sounds, smells, and feelings of this time of year. Have a good time with people that you know and care about.

Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy and happiness. Make the most of each moment. Take the time off from school and work, and do what you and your girlfriend or boyfriend enjoy doing. Maybe don’t spend a lot of time alone with them. Enjoy their company and double date or go to parties.

God created us and said that His creation was good. It becomes bad only if people make it bad. Don’t be one of those that spoils the fun, if you can help it. Walk away from fights and arguments. Stay with those who aren’t trying to get themselves arrested or killed. That was easy for me.

There will come a day in thirty or forty years when you will say, “I remember when . . .” Let them have good memories of the music, friends, laughter, and fun. OK, now for the rest of us. I just talked to a friend of mine who celebrated his ninetieth birthday before Christmas. I never heard of a sixteen- or twenty-one-year-old who had more fun. Make this Christmas your best.

Charles (Chuck) Kensinger

Walk With a Servant

Tag: Family