Kindness Matters

“I was doing eighty on the highway because the Vice Principal said my second grader was caught “distributing contraband” in the cafeteria. I thought he had drugs. I was wrong. It was pepperoni.

I walked into the administrative office still wearing my work boots, drywall dust on my jeans. The secretary looked at me like I was going to track mud on her carpet. I didn’t care. I just wanted to see Leo.

I found him sitting on the “Cool Down Chair” in the corner of Vice Principal Miller’s office. He didn’t look scared. He didn’t look guilty. He looked confused. His hands were folded in his lap, and there was a smudge of tomato sauce on his chin.

“Mr. Russo, thank you for coming so quickly,” Mrs. Miller said. She was a nice enough woman, usually, but today she had the posture of a steel beam. “We have a zero-tolerance policy regarding the exchange of food items. It’s a liability issue. Allergies. Sanitary concerns. We simply cannot have students passing food around like… like it’s a free-for-all.”

She slid a discipline across the desk. Incident: Unauthorized distribution of lunch materials. Defiance of cafeteria protocol.

“He gave away his lunch?” I asked, looking at Leo. “That’s why I’m missing a half-day of pay? Because he gave away a slice of pizza?”

“It’s not just the pizza, Mr. Russo. It’s the defiance,” she sighed, adjusting her glasses. “The lunch monitor instructed Leo to keep his food to himself. He refused. He insisted on giving half to a classmate, Samuel. When told to stop, Leo argued with the monitor.”

I turned to my son. “Leo, buddy. Look at me. Why did you do that? You know you’re supposed to eat your own lunch.”

Leo looked up, his big brown eyes filled with frustration that seemed too heavy for a seven-year-old.

“Sam didn’t have a tray, Dad,” Leo said. His voice was small but steady.

“What do you mean?”

“It was Pizza Friday,” Leo explained, as if that explained everything. In elementary school, it basically did. “Sam got in line, but when he got to the register, the lady took his tray away. She threw the pizza in the trash bin behind her and gave him the cold cheese sandwich in the plastic bag. She said his account was ‘in the red.'”

I felt a tightening in my chest. I knew that term. I knew the ‘Cheese Sandwich of Shame.’ It happens when parents forget to load the lunch account or when money is tight.

“Sam started crying,” Leo continued. “He didn’t want the cold sandwich. He was hungry. So, I broke my pizza in half. I gave him the big piece.”

“And then?” I asked.

“Then the monitor came over and took it away from Sam. She threw that piece away, too. She said I was breaking the safety rules.” Leo pointed a small finger at the wall behind Mrs. Miller’s desk. “She said rules are rules.”

I looked where he was pointing.

Directly behind the Vice Principal’s head was a massive, laminated poster, decorated with bright primary colors and cartoon stars. It was the school’s motto for the year.

KINDNESS MATTERS.

Below it, in smaller print: In a world where you can be anything, be kind.

Leo looked at me, then at Mrs. Miller. “Dad, I’m confused. The poster is big. The rule book is small. I thought the big poster was the boss.”

The room went silent. The air conditioner hummed. Mrs. Miller opened her mouth, then closed it. She looked at the liability forms on her desk, then she turned around and looked at the poster she walked past every single morning.

The monitor said I was being bad,” Leo whispered. “But if I ate my pizza while Sam cried… wouldn’t that make me bad?”

Mrs. Miller took off her glasses. The corporate stiffness drained out of her shoulders. She was suddenly just a person in a room with a father and a son who had asked a question she couldn’t answer with a handbook.

“It’s a policy, Mr. Russo,” she said, her voice softer now, almost apologetic. “We have to protect the school from lawsuits. If Sam had an allergy…”

“Does Sam have an allergy?” I asked.

“No,” she admitted. “But we have to assume…”

“I know,” I cut her off. I stood up and pulled out my wallet. It was thin, but I had enough. “How much is Sam’s debt?”

“Excuse me?”

“Sam’s lunch account. How much is he in the red? Five bucks? Ten?”

“Mr. Russo, you don’t have to…”

“I know I don’t have to. I want to. How much?”

She typed for a second. “Four dollars and fifty cents.”

I pulled out a twenty. “Clear it. And put the rest on Sam’s account for next week. And if Leo gives him a slice of pizza again, please just… look the other way.”

I didn’t wait for the change. I signed the disciplinary slip—admitting my son was a “disturbance”—and walked out with Leo holding my hand.

We walked to the truck in silence. I buckled him in.

“Am I in trouble, Dad?” Leo asked, looking at his knees. “I promise I won’t do it again.”

I started the engine and turned to him.

“Leo, look at me.”

He looked up, bracing for the lecture.

“You are not in trouble,” I said firmly. “You did the right thing. The school has its rules, and they must follow them to keep their jobs. But you have a heart, and you have to follow that to keep your soul.”

“But they threw the pizza away,” he said sadly.

“I know. Sometimes doing the right thing makes a mess. Do it anyway.”

We stopped at a pizza place on the way home. I bought two large pepperoni pies. One for us, and one for Leo to take to school on Monday, just in case.

As I watched him eat, getting sauce all over his face again, I realized something terrifying.

We spend eighteen years trying to program our kids to fit into the system, to sit still, to stay in line, to follow the handbook. We teach them that “compliance” is the same thing as “goodness.” But today, my seven-year-old showed me that sometimes, you must break the rules to keep the promise on the wall.

Civilization isn’t built on handbooks and liability waivers. It’s built on breaking your pizza in half when your friend is hungry.

If that’s a punishable offense, then I hope my son stays a criminal for the rest of his life.”

I found this on Facebook, and it was not accredited by any author. This is why we should never accept the authorities that claim something as they see it. Rules and manuals are just that. Kindness is a law of God. I think we all need to follow it. If this is your story, please advise me and I will reassign the copyright when you provide proof of authorship.

©Copyright 2026 by Charles Kensinger

Spiritual fruit

Can I tell you that I do not mind being called fruity, if you are referring to the fruit of the spirit?  These are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. As a Christian, this is how we should measure ourselves. Don’t fall into the trap of being judgmental. It is easy to do.

Galatians 5:22 begins with love. It is interesting that Paul also includes patience as the first attribute of love in First Corinthians 13 when he defines Agape’ for us. Kindness is also included in that list. I think he is trying to tell me something. Patience and kindness are important. We should not ignore the other parts of love. No envying, rudeness, selfishness, irritability, or resentment are also part of how God loves us.

Joy and peace are two words to look at more closely. Happiness is fleeting. Joy is also temporary if we let it be. Fruitful joy is hard to accomplish without Holy Spirit. Joy does not mean that you never have a bad day. When things are not going your way, joy lets you realize that things will become better. We let our minds betray us into thinking that our life is bad when it is just life.

Peace also can elude those who work without Him. It is not the absence of conflict. It is the presence of love and joy. Do you accept what the Lord has given you? Paul tells us to give thanks in all things. (1 Thessalonians 5:18) He also states in Philippians 4:11 that he has learned to be content. Notice the use of the word learned. Contentment is something we must also train ourselves to have.

Patience is the most difficult thing for me. “Lord, give me patience and give it to me now, it is what I usually pray. That prayer may miss the mark. Be careful about asking for it. His answer will continually test you. Patience is hard because we live in an instant society. We have our phones with us and can call, text, or check the internet thousands of times a day. I grew up at a time when we did not even have a home phone.

We all know how to be kind, good, and gentle. These may need to be tweaked by the Spirit. Follow His guidance, and you will arrive quicker. Again, these need to be intentional. We know what to do; we just need to be reminded to do it all day long. Practice it, and it will become as automatic as breathing or your heartbeat.

Self-control is another tough one. Notice that the word control follows self, indicating who should be in control. For Christians, we can hand this job over to Holy Spirit, if we will let Him take leadership of our lives. That becomes easier the more you do it.

I desire that you all become fruitier as I try to do the same. I mentioned judgment earlier. Let’s avoid that and try for discernment. (1 Corinthians 12:7-11) This is one of the gifts of the Spirit. You cannot have these gifts if your spirit is still dead. A relationship with Jesus is needed for the rebirth of your spirit. (John 3:1-21) After you start that relationship, the fruits will appear if you cultivate them.

©Copyright 2026 by Charles Kensinger

Words

A local radio personality asked people to call in with a word for the year. He felt like this was better than asking about resolutions. I agree. My problem is that I can’t choose one word for the entire year.

Peace, joy, love, kindness, and self-control immediately come to mind. They are things to pray for and strive for. Concentrating on these for just one year will not achieve lasting results. We must focus on them every day, week, and year.

I have a long list of words for different occasions that I will share this year as I think of them. Watch for my new category, words. I will post columns there to give us all additional information about things that will be beneficial to us and our world.

Let’s start with kindness. It is a simple word. A dictionary definition is the quality or state of being kind. Of a sympathetic or helpful nature is the meaning of kind. At least that is the one that relates to kindness. Do you see the problem?

We should all treat each other with kindness, but we disagree on exactly what that means. Let’s try a different approach. Think of a time when someone was not kind to you. That’s easy. You just thought of at least one or two incidents where someone was not kind to you.

Turnabout is fair play. Looking at those actions, consider times when you act like that to others. Do not tell me that you never do that. I know I have times when I am not kind. We are talking about improving ourselves over the next year. First, let’s try not to be unkind.

We can all consider each other as our equals and treat them as such. That is being kind. We are not all kind when we drive. Think about how you act toward other drivers. Some run red lights or stop signs. I have witnessed this. Many of us do not enjoy the roundabouts that we have now. Most have yield signs on all four streets.

Some of you say that you cannot yield to others because they will not yield to you. It does not hurt anyone if I fail to yield. Until I hit another car. That is not being kind. It is also not kind to jump out of your vehicle and scream and yell at another person that you hit. You know you were at fault, but to scare them, you try to make them believe they are responsible.

That will be our next word. I have noticed how many of us seem not to know what it means to take responsibility for our own actions. We will discuss that next time. Until then, I would like each of us to eliminate as much of our unkindness as we can and find ways to be kinder as often as possible. Let’s make our lives better, one word at a time

©Copyright 2026 by Charles Kensinger