Tag: Love is patient

It’s in his kiss

August 20, 2025

Kissing in different cultures means varied things. There are also different types of kisses. On the cheek, the hand, the lips, or even the ear or back of the neck. Kissing in our culture is considered romantic. European, Middle Eastern, and other cultures greet friends and acquaintances with a kiss or two on the cheek.

Handshaking is the American method of greeting in most of our communities. As a Christian and a Baptist, I am very familiar with this process. We often modify the standard handshake. You and your friends or family may have a secret or non-secret way to greet each other. Organizations can have variations on the common greeting.

I want to talk about the romantic type of kiss. One of my favorite subjects for situation comedies. You take a prepubescent girl and a boy of a similar age, and a story of the desire for a first kiss and a distaste for the opposite sex. The variations are innumerable. Almost every TV show has had an episode based on this situation.

We all know that movies often feature storylines about kisses. Romantic comedies almost always require kissing between the two leads. Often, there is this kind of action between those who do not believe they are in love. I can think of many films where young people and sometimes older characters find kissing many others a fun thing to do.

Jewelry companies want us to think that their products will get us kissed. That has not been my experience. I can’t talk a lot about the subject of kissing multiple partners. I kissed two or three other girls before I started dating Cindy. When I began kissing her, I enjoyed it very much.

I think she also enjoyed it. She didn’t like it when I tried to kiss her with other people around. When I kissed her goodnight after a date, she never refused or acted like she did not enjoy it. As our relationship continued, so did my desire to hold her and kiss her even more.

As with most couples, we no longer spend time just holding each other and kissing as we did early in our marriage. Hugging and kissing are still part of our life together. It isn’t as large a part as it was in the early years. Three children, twelve grandchildren, and all of life’s time constraints take a toll.

Intimacy is still important. It is necessary for a strong relationship. It is a form of communication for us. We sleep in the same bed. Share a house and many other things. Our fiftieth anniversary is a year away, and I still enjoy being with her as much as I ever have.

I hope that your marriage is going well, also. A kiss is not the best way to tell if you are loved. Paul gives us a list of things that we should use to indicate if someone loves us. Patience and kindness are two of them. Work on kissing, hugging, kindness, and patience, and I think you will go a long way.

©Copyright 2025 by Charles Kensinger

I think I’m in love.

May 5, 2025

In college, this was a saying that many guys my age used. One of my friends or acquaintances would say this when we say a beautiful girl or woman walks by. A friend of mine at Southwest Baptist College in Bolivar, MO, changed that slightly. He was a ministerial student like me. He changed it to “I think I’m in lust.”

There is a difference between love and lust. Let me define the two words. Love is not an emotion. Lust is a desire for something sexual. I do not like to use dictionaries for words like love. Secular scholars are more interested in contemporary usages of the word and not what the Biblical examples indicate.

I agree with Paul’s definition of the love of God. You’ve read it in First Corinthians chapter 13. It includes patience, kindness, lack of envy, boasting, and pride. This is what we should strive for in our romantic love.

Do you know how to define what you mean when you say “I love you” to your spouse? The Association referred to it as “Cherish” in the song in 1966. “Cherish is the word I use to describe all the feelings that I have” is the opening line. This song also tells us that all the other guys say, “I love you.”

All they want is to touch your face, your hands, or hold you. Others say they will love you all the rest of their lives. When I was dating the girls were warned not to believe us when we said that we loved them. Most of these guys would use the line, “If you really love me, we should have sex.”

I never was one to do that. I had one girlfriend that I learned later and she stopped dating me because I never tried to have sex with her. Cindy will tell you that I haven’t had that problem for a long time.

On television and in movies, young people ask their parents or other adults how you know if you love someone. For me, it was because I wanted to be with her. Not every minute of every day like the songs say. When we are apart, I need to get back to her. I hope you have someone that gives you that kind of security.

This is not sexual. That is why I say that sex is not the same as love. I do not like to use the term making love. That makes love a noun, not a verb. Love is something you do. As Paul says, “It is patient, it is kind, it never fails.”

I explain to those who say that they fell in love and have fallen out of love by adding I did not fall. I jumped in. I can leave if I do not want to continue to love. I have a choice to love or not. It is the same for you. Jump or stay where you are.

Love is a choice as the book title says. It is up to you. Like Doc Brown said at the end of the third installment of the Back to the Future Trilogy, “Your future isn’t set. Make it what you want it to be.”

©Copyright 2025 by Charles Kensinger