Have you considered either of these options? This morning on the radio, the announcer was speaking of a podcast where the guest was encouraging others to promote fostering in their church congregations. Some of our friends over the years have adopted children or been foster parents.

I remember a single mom that I knew from church when I was a teenager. She had three daughters, and her youngest was a boy. Another friend and his wife had three daughters. The first lady died, and the father did not want his children. The three girls had places to go with the family, but no one wanted the boy.

My friend and his wife applied to be foster parents with the intent of eventually adopting this little guy. This was what happened, and as with many families, the son eventually rebelled against his adopted family, and it was years before he returned to them after he grew up enough to realize we all need someone.

I have shared another story of adoption before. One of the young men in my class at church asked me one morning after class if his mother loved him. I knew what he was talking about because he had been adopted as a baby. He wanted to know why his birth mother had given him up.

I asked what year he was born, and when he told me, I responded that she did love him. The question in his eyes told me I needed to explain. I informed him that abortion had been legalized in the U.S. with the Roe Vs. Wade Supreme Court decision in 1972. His birth was after that.

If she had not cared about him, she could have simply aborted the pregnancy, and he would never have been born. Many women have fallen prey to the lies that these are not human beings and are called fetuses or blobs of tissue. I know that the Bible teaches that we are alive from conception.

I explained this to him and told him that his birth mother knew he was important and needed a family that could provide for him. To me, that was the ultimate act of love: allowing others to raise him after she gave birth. He seemed to understand this answer and went to church.

A short time later, his adoptive mother asked me what I had said to him. I told her exactly what I had said.  She told me that he had been asking her and his dad this question, and they were unable to say anything that satisfied him. When he stopped asking, she questioned why, and he told her that I had convinced him that she did love him. That’s why she asked me what I had said.

Adoption and fostering are both admirable things to do. Do it to help the children, not to fulfill a desire in your life or to make money from the support that may be given to foster parents. My wife and I love our daughters. We were like many characters in the Bible. We knew each other, and she became pregnant. It was easy for us.

When it is more difficult, consider helping a child who needs a family. One family in our church fosters newborns until they can be placed permanently. At times, these children return to them when the new family doesn’t work out. Mostly, they love the babies for a few weeks, and then they take in the next child.

One boy returned to them and stayed. He’s in high school now. He is one of the finest young men I know. He is well-behaved and highly intelligent and, if he makes good decisions, will go far. I have seen the opposite happen. An adopted child sometimes makes poor choices and makes their lives more difficult, just like our naturally born children can.

That is up to the kids. As parents, we raise them the best we can, make mistakes, apologize and ask forgiveness, and continue the process. This is true whether they are born to us, adopted, or with us for a short period. As parents, that is what we do for our children.

©Copyright 2026 by Charles Kensinger