Charles (Chuck) Kensinger

We have heard many stories about blended families in our time. When I was a boy, almost all my friends had a mom and dad and at least one sibling. Many had more than one brother or sister as I did. Few of the kids I went to school or church with had last names different from one parent.

In high school, I began to meet others whose mother and father both had a family name that did not match theirs. The song “My boy” is about this type of situation. Elvie Shane wrote this song and it was first recorded in 2020. It is the true story of His wife and her son.

One of the lines that affect me the most is “He’s got somebody else’s eyes I’m seeing myself in.” When my children and grandchildren were born people commented on their features. “She has your nose” or your eyes or your teeth. That’s right. When my daughters were born, they had my dad’s teeth. He didn’t have any real ones in his mouth. They were man-made.

The serious part of this line is “I’m seeing myself in.” We need to stop and view ourselves through the eyes of children. They do not judge. They can measure their worth through how we treat them. My kids and grandkids react to me as the one who is trying to be funny. “Don’t take Pawpaw too seriously” is the byword around me. How does your son or daughter react to you?

Keep in mind that Mr. Shane and his boy do not have the same name. It makes no difference to a true dad. The emotions are the same. Love is a choice. It is a verb. His boy knows that he loves him because he hasn’t missed a ballgame yet. A dad is there for what is important to his kid.

My mom and dad were at the important events in my life. The school activities like open houses and annual fundraisers. In my senior year in high school, they even came to watch my debate partner and me compete against the two best speakers in our school. There was no official decision after. When we got home, they told me they thought I had won. That was love.

This is what should never change. The love of a parent for a child is present when they are at your death bed, and you see the pain in their eyes. They think they are losing you. You know his step is necessary if you want to spend eternity together as believers in Christ. That is also love.

Some fathers have walked away. Not Elvie. This young man is not his entire life. He is an integral part and is making him a better dad. Your children make you a better mom or dad because they test your love and your patience. Paul tells us in first Corinthians chapter 13 verse four that love is patient and kind. That will make a family last.

©Copyright 2022 by Charles Kensinger